How did British Petroleum executives behave after the worst environmental oil spill in the history of the known universe? Horribly. Like your worst neighbor, who is supposed to be watching your house; instead comes over, drinks all your booze, steals your cool stuff, trashes your house and kills a bunch of puppies, bunnies and birdies. Then pawns your stuff and spends all the money at a strip club. This, while you are away at Aunt Elma’s funeral. It comes down to this: These guys are some of the biggest assholes available. They lie and cheat and buy off politicians all to protect themselves and other rich people after they fuck up! They are just dicks!

Most have heard of the Exxon Valdez Alaska oil spill disaster. Bad huh?

Here is a story less familiar but certainly rivals the others in its ability to illustrate how we stand, right now, on the cusp of another epic environmental fail. On March 22, 2006 the distracted idiot fuckwad helmsman of the “Queen of the North”, the pride of the BC Ferries fleet, missed a critical turn coming out of Grenville Channel and slammed the ferry’s bow, at 17.5 knots, onto the rocks of Gil Island. The “Queen of the North”, 6 years later, still sits in 1.400 feet of water and everyday leaks a little more toxic diesel out of her ruptured fuel tanks that bubbles to the surface. The Gitga’at First Nations people of the area had to learn new words after March 22, 2006. Words like burbling, sheen, shine and boom now have become part of their lexicon.

The Gitga’at have learned many new things recently. First and foremost: when disaster strikes they alone will be left to clean up the mess.

Enbridge, a Canadian based company (with terrible environmental track record), operates the world’s longest crude oil pipeline system, in Canada and the U.S. It has before the Canadian legislature something called the Northern Gateway Proposal. Essentially, these Enbridge jerkoffs want to build a $5.8 billion pipeline that runs 731 miles from Alberta to Kitimat B.C. At Kitimat, giant oil supertankers — some as long as the Empire State Building is tall, loaded with 2.15 million barrels of crude — would navigate the treacherous channels, fjords and islands of the Great Bear Rainforest to the open sea on route to the Orient, primarily to the almost insatiable current energy appetite in China. “This is one of the biggest environmental threats we have ever seen,” said Ian McAllister co-founder of Pacific Wild, a wilderness protection organization that works Canada’s Pacific rim. “And it will become one of the biggest environmental battles Canada has ever witnessed. It’s going to be a bare-knuckle fight”

What has Mr. McAllister and other environmental experts so freaked? Here is the safety record for Endbrige. These are the facts:

Between 1999 and 2008, Enbridge lists 610 spills that released approximately 21 million litres (132,000 barrels) of crude oil. On July 4, 2002 an Enbridge pipeline ruptured in a marsh near the town of Cohasset, Minnesota in Itasca County, spilling 1,000,000 litres of crude oil. In an attempt to keep the oil from contaminating the Mississippi, the Minnesota Department of Natural Resources set a controlled burn that created a smoke plume a mile high and 5 miles long.

In 2006, there were 67 reportable spills totalling 900,345 litres on Enbridge’s energy and transportation and distribution system; in 2007, there were 65 reportable spills totalling 2,190,367 litres.

On March 18, 2006, approximately 97,459 litres of crude oil were released when a pump failed at Enbridge’s Willmar terminal in Saskatchewan. According to Enbridge, roughly half the oil was recovered, the remainder contributing to ‘off-site’ impacts.

On January 1, 2007 an Enbridge pipeline that runs from Superior, Wisconsin to near Whitewater, Wisconsin cracked open and spilled ~189,270 litres of crude oil onto farmland and into a drainage ditch. The same pipeline was struck by construction crews on February 2, 2007, in Rusk County, Wisconsin, spilling ~476,961 litres of crude. Some of the oil filled a hole more than 20 feet deep and was reported to have contaminated the local water table.

In April 2007, roughly 990,013 litres of crude oil spilled into a field downstream of an Enbridge pumping station near Glenavon, Saskatchewan. Long-term site remediation is being attempted to bring the site to “as close as possible to its original condition”.

In 2009, U.S. affiliate Enbridge Energy Partners agreed to pay $1.1 million to settle a lawsuit brought against the company by the state of Wisconsin for 545 environmental violations. Wisconsin’s Department of Justice, Attorney General J.B. Van Hollen said “…the incidents of violation were numerous and widespread, and resulted in impacts to the streams and wetlands throughout the various watersheds.”

In January 2009 an Enbridge pipeline leaked about 635,949 of oil southeast of Fort McMurray at the company’s Cheecham Terminal tank farm.

In April 2010 an Enbridge pipeline ruptured spilling more than 1500 litres of oil in Virden, Manitoba, which leaked into the Boghill Creek which eventually connects to the Assiniboine River.

In July 2010, a leaking pipeline spilled an estimated 3,785,411 litres of crude oil into Talmadge Creek leading to the Kalamazoo River in southwest Michigan on Monday, July 26.

These are the facts

The Canadian government’s joint review panel is expected to debate this issue for at least the next 14-16 months.

This cannot be allowed to happen. This MUST not be allowed to happen. The stakes are just too high.

More information and a petition to e-sign here

Sources: National Geographic, Richard Harris NPR, Ian McDonald Florida State University

 How do I choose the perfect voice and why this is critical?

As with any social media strategy, goals identification is paramount. What is the end game to adding voice over and/or audio to your social media?  Synchronization of your voice talent to the skewed demographic for your product or service is vital.  For example, if it’s a car commercial for the latest model Corvette you’re going to want a voice that conveys energy,  enthusiasm and sportiness. if it’s an online demonstration for the latest legal services, you’ll need a clear, helpful, friendly but informative voice. Can you imagine anyone other than James Earl Jones as the voice of Darth Vader? Perfect casting!  Audio accounts for 38% of the total impact (55% visual), and ONLY 7% in the words you use, so it’s imperative to get the right tone!  If you can get both the visual and the auditory factors at the sweet point, 93% percent of your finished, is in place.

 What to expect from a pro?

So, you have chosen your “voice talent”. What should you expect? First and foremost: Excellent pre-production communication. A pro, opens the lines to ensure that; proper tonality, style, technical delivery and any other ideas or requirements the client may have are discussed and met. Better still, I try to make helpful suggestions where I see fit. These are usually greatly appreciated, in that they are things generally not thought of. Spec or demo reads that have final client approval are a must, but I also offer to make changes if necessary, even once a final version has been given the “green light”. A pro, will “under promise and over deliver.” 

 Should I get approval from stakeholders?

If you work with outside clients, it’s often a good idea to get their approval of the talent you’ve selected. Clients usually appreciate this gesture and this way you know they’ll be happy with the results.

 Why include Voice Over and Audio?

Including voice over/audio will drive more traffic to your website and focus more attention on your social Media projects. Today, clients are hyper-tuned to the newest of innovations in online media, such as G+ Hangouts, Skypecasting, webinars, podcasts and live event streaming. Branding online presence with audio through these channels is sure to bring results.

A clear part of your initial strategy should include maximizing your marketing dollar. Production costs can be restrictive when it comes to creating traditional media marketing. Investing in a professional voice actor or actress can be a cost-effective way to increase the impact of your on-line and Social Media marketing efforts.

If you have any questions about audio architecture or sound design, reach out. You can find me all over the place.

Martin Kruze, was one of the victims of sexual abuse at Maple Leaf Gardens in Toronto during the 1970s. In 1997, Kruze revealed that as a young hockey player he had been sexually abused at Maple Leaf Gardens by Gordon Stuckless, an employee at the Gardens. Stuckless was eventually convicted and sentenced to two years less a day in prison. Three days after the sentencing, Martin Kruze jumped off a bridge to his death.

It is a terrible story that continues to haunt the city of Toronto, the Maple Leafs, professional hockey, sports in general and well, umm…pretty much everyone who is familiar with this horrible nightmare.

As of this writing Joe Paterno lies close to death. Paterno who was Penn State’s head football coach from 1966-2011 was diagnosed with lung cancer shortly after being fired in November in the wake of a child sex abuse scandal involving former top assistant coach Jerry Sandusky. Paterno, who gave his first interview on the subject last week, said: “I didn’t know exactly how to handle it and I was afraid to do something that might jeopardize what the university procedure was, …So I backed away and turned it over to some other people, people I thought would have a little more expertise than I did. It didn’t work out that way.”

That’s the best (on his death bed) Joe Pa could do. Seriously!

A tale that was known by many, and denied by all. And continues to be denied, even in death. How strong was this horribly evil pact anyway?

Something wrong here.

Something bad.

Penn State, right now, is busy buying up .XXX Internet domains with the school name and nicknames. Why? To try to prevent people from starting up porn sites with the school’s name in light of the scandal. Talk about a dis-connect!

There is no need here to cite statistics and case studies about the ramifications of child sex abuse.

“As you know, the kids that were the victims, I think we ought to say a prayer for them,” said the coach.

So many lives de-railed before they even had a chance to begin. Lives ruined by a man
secretly given an all access pass to sexual depravity in an effort to protect revenue and continue a never-ending quest for a trophy, that costs about $70.

I guess what is really leaving me stunned, is the offering up of prayers for the victims (as many as 20 some reports indicate) while still denying any personal accountability.

I hear the “Rose Bowl” in Hell is quite the hot contest!

Post Script: Joe Paterno passed away in hospital last night (01/22/12)

Your answer depends on your gender. According to a new survey by Fitness magazine, 57 percent of women think they look “fat” while naked, while 48 percent of men give a thumbs-up to themselves in the buff.

Guys are more likely to shed their threads in general:

More than 27 percent of guys walk around naked in the locker room, versus just nine percent of gals.
20 percent of guys have taken nude photos of themselves, but only 15 percent of women have posed without clothes.
What body parts do girls and guys dislike the most?

21 percent of women say they dislike their thighs
11 percent of men like their butt the least
Just Asking … How comfortable are you being naked?
Do you flaunt what ya got … or cover up as much as possible?